Episode 39

Transcript

SPEAKER_02 0:01

You're hanging out with Bob and Brad. Two guys with too many moods, too many tapes, and not nearly enough facts. Welcome to Bob and Brad. Perpetually wrong.

SPEAKER_00 0:19

It's like a 1970s bingo haul here. Jesus Christ, I smoked two frickin' packs of Canadian wildfires already today.

SPEAKER_04 0:27

Holy shit. We should be able to sue them. Oh. Hey? Yeah. If the wind was blowing north, we had a factory fire.

SPEAKER_00 0:35

They'd be all over us.

SPEAKER_04 0:36

It would be. Jesus. I hope you guys all made it through your day today. I think it was the worst one this week. Tomorrow's supposed to start opening up, right?

SPEAKER_00 0:45

Yep. Tomorrow evening it's going to start clearing up. But for those of you who don't know what's going on, Canada's on fire. Holy shit. And the whole fucking country? You would think by the amount of smoke we got here. It is it is low visibility.

SPEAKER_04 1:04

First time in a long time, I drove in this morning. Didn't have to put on my glasses, didn't have to put down the visor, and I could stare directly at the sun.

SPEAKER_00 1:11

Oh yeah.

SPEAKER_04 1:12

Beautiful round circle of orange.

SPEAKER_00 1:14

Yep. Just a glowing. It's pretty bad. So you look out, and that's all you can see is smoke.

SPEAKER_04 1:24

Everywhere you look. Oh actually, this morning we had some ash in the pond. Did you check your pond before you it's dark when you go to the house?

SPEAKER_00 1:30

Yeah, I know. I was still dark when I left. Canada, get your shit together.

SPEAKER_04 1:35

Hey, 1969. Quote me on this. Google me, folks. But from 1969 to 1995, we had wildfires. We were able to contain and put them out. All of a sudden, here we are in 2026. The fire trucks are better, the planes are better, more efficient. Workers are we would think would be better. But we can't seem to contain a wildfire anymore.

SPEAKER_00 2:00

Yeah, I it this is this is something I've never seen anything like this.

SPEAKER_04 2:03

No, we had something similar two years ago, three years ago.

SPEAKER_00 2:07

Yeah.

SPEAKER_04 2:09

It was recent. But it wasn't like this. No, it wasn't this bad. It wasn't any not even close to it. I'd swear to God, Windsor's just fucking nothing but a hot spot.

SPEAKER_00 2:16

Yeah. Jesus.

SPEAKER_04 2:18

So it's just hazy all day. And then you feel like you're smoking. Well, um slide your chair out a little bit. Just a little bit. I got something. As you can tell, combined, we've got 85 pounds of weight loss here.

SPEAKER_00 2:33

That's right.

SPEAKER_04 2:34

We're not smoking because that would fuck up our treadmilling. But we didn't treadmill tonight because we're digesting the smoke.

SPEAKER_00 2:41

Yeah. Um you know, you know my allergies are something bad.

SPEAKER_04 2:46

Gotta be worse today.

SPEAKER_00 2:48

And one of the biggest triggers I have with my allergies is being around a campfire. A smoky campfire.

SPEAKER_04 2:55

Yeah, because you always get out of the smoke because you get your fucking eyes all down.

SPEAKER_00 2:59

And this right here is like sticking my head right in the fucking campfire. It sucks.

SPEAKER_04 3:07

I wouldn't mind it so much if it smelled like a campfire.

SPEAKER_00 3:10

It smells like poison.

SPEAKER_04 3:11

Yes, it does. Yes, it does.

SPEAKER_00 3:14

There goes the conspiracy theory.

SPEAKER_04 3:16

Fucking Bill Gates and the fucking Clintons over there fucking shaking shit out. That shouldn't be.

SPEAKER_00 3:20

Well, they're probably next week gonna roll out a fucking uh medication to fix smoke inhalation.

SPEAKER_04 3:26

Oh, they probably well, yeah. Pfizer's gonna come out with it tomorrow morning.

SPEAKER_00 3:30

Yeah.

SPEAKER_04 3:30

Yep. Fuck. Um hurry up.

SPEAKER_00 3:33

We got tents set up everywhere. Come get your shot.

SPEAKER_04 3:36

Yep. You got the smoke inhalation. You got the fucking killer lettuce.

SPEAKER_00 3:41

Yep.

SPEAKER_04 3:43

Uh they didn't get us with COVID. I know a couple guys that have the uh fire shits because of the lettuce.

SPEAKER_00 3:49

Yeah.

SPEAKER_04 3:50

Doesn't seem like much fun. One of my drivers, though, I gotta give him a shout out, old Rudeo.

SPEAKER_00 3:55

Uh-huh.

SPEAKER_04 3:55

The guy been shitting like crazy since uh Sunday, Saturday or Sunday. He's so committed to not screwing me that he's shown up every day this week.

SPEAKER_00 4:06

He was wearing a diaper, wasn't he?

SPEAKER_04 4:07

No, he had to lay a couple sweatshirts out on the floor of his sleeper to let one go.

SPEAKER_01 4:12

Oh.

SPEAKER_04 4:13

And then he had to ball it up, throw it out. Showed me his care package today. It's a grocery bag. It's a trash bag with trash bags inside it. Um, two different pairs of clothes in case he has an accident. But the guy has been there all week doing it, and it's been hot, and I've been seeing restaurants closing because of the heat.

SPEAKER_00 4:34

A lot of places are closing.

SPEAKER_04 4:36

Yeah, and I drive down the goddamn road and I see a crew up on the roof shingling. And it reminds me of when I used to do that shit. We were out there, take care of your women and your small pets because we don't want them dying because of the heat. But hey, get my house built. Hey, get that tar out on that road.

SPEAKER_00 4:52

Yeah, but if you die, who's gonna support the family?

SPEAKER_04 4:55

Well, nobody seemed to think about it then.

SPEAKER_00 4:59

Yeah. Yeah, I would become soft. I was out in it today, and it was uh you get out of the truck for any extended amount of time, and it's it gets a little tough to breathe.

SPEAKER_04 5:10

You think anywhere in Michigan they're putting out fog signs? You know, like when it's really foggy, they'll put out signs on the blinker board? Right. I mean it's equivalent to fog. It is so fog that hasn't gone away.

SPEAKER_01 5:21

Yeah, yeah.

SPEAKER_04 5:22

Um had a good uh good uh bike uh event trip splash, whatever you want to fucking call it over the weekend. First time going that direction with you guys, and that was fun.

SPEAKER_00 5:36

You know, and even growing up over that way, I never been to where we were at. So that was pretty cool.

SPEAKER_04 5:43

And you know, it's funny because you would think that there would be one fucking highway that go right up the center of the thumb to up to Port Austin.

SPEAKER_00 5:50

With like tree branches off. Yeah. There's not no I.

SPEAKER_04 5:54

I don't know. You remember what town we stopped in and had the good pizza?

SPEAKER_00 5:58

Uh I don't know what town that was.

SPEAKER_04 6:02

Started with a B. I do know that.

SPEAKER_00 6:04

I'm not sure where I'm gas station pizza, best I ever had. That was good. Shit was amazing. And I don't think it was just because we were really hungry. I think it was just a lot of people. I think it was just really good pizza. Yeah, um, but before you get started too far into that whole deal, while we've actually got people listening.

SPEAKER_02 6:22

Yeah. Oh, I know where we're talking about.

SPEAKER_00 6:25

We were talking, and you know, all of you guys get to hear what we want to tell you about. So we want the listeners to go to perpetually wrong.com. There's a spot on there. You can message, send a message, and if there's anything that you guys want our opinions on or want to hear us touch on or t elaborate on or or go off about or whatever it may be, um go to perpetually wrong.com.

SPEAKER_04 7:02

Right there at the bottom of the home page, Bob. Bottom of the homepage, contact us.

SPEAKER_00 7:06

Hit send a message, give us some some things you want to hear about. This is for you guys, it's not for us. So if there's something you want our opinions on, our advice on, we've got lots of advice. Um, you know, we're we do a pretty good job with marriage advice.

SPEAKER_04 7:23

Oh. So um between us, we've been married 35 years.

SPEAKER_00 7:28

Yeah.

SPEAKER_04 7:29

If that ain't good fucking shit, if that's not a resume.

SPEAKER_00 7:34

We can get you out of any sticky situation you can get yourself into.

SPEAKER_04 7:38

And some of you know who were married too, so you know we must know what we're talking about.

SPEAKER_00 7:43

That's right, because uh we make a tough cookies. Yes, they are. So um, yeah. So go on the website, and while you're there, go to the social media sites, the TikToks, the YouTubes, the page it's been updated. It's been updated.

SPEAKER_04 8:01

So go on down there, buy us a beer. That's an option.

SPEAKER_00 8:04

Yeah, yeah, you can buy us a beer. Um, but yeah, go on there, check it out, make sure you're liking and subscribing and following on our social platforms because you know that there's always information getting posted on there or something funny that Brad thinks needs to be posted, or some of that stuff makes me giggle. Not even that funny, but I still post it. So it's not either way, it makes me giggle. Make sure you're following along so you don't miss out on anything. Um a lot of people were like, Oh, I didn't know you guys were doing another bike ride. Well, you missed attention. Yeah, you missed. So pay attention that'll frickin' ball. Yeah. So anyway, now you can go back into your previous.

SPEAKER_04 8:51

Yeah, no shit. All the way over here.

SPEAKER_00 8:52

Yeah.

SPEAKER_04 8:53

Yeah. Yep. They weren't thumbing it. And the way we were treated, I wouldn't have no problem sawing all this off and keeping that. Yeah, the thumb was great. Yep. So it was a good time. Um uh couple quirky bars, but you know, it it it was it was neat, it was fun, it was just different because, you know, like uh Kelly and Trish said, you know, we're so accustomed to going up the west side that you don't look around much because I seen it, seen it, seen it, seen it. Right, right. And over there it was kind of fun because everything was new. Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 9:20

And let me tell you, Port Austin, Michigan. That's a very tip, tip, yep, top of the thumb. There is no shortage of funds over there.

SPEAKER_04 9:31

Oh no.

SPEAKER_00 9:32

They have got money.

SPEAKER_04 9:34

Yeah, welcome to Chicago Part 2.

SPEAKER_00 9:36

Yeah, and Detroit.

SPEAKER_04 9:38

And Detroit.

SPEAKER_00 9:38

Yeah. But no, a nice place. It's a real real beautiful area. The only thing with that side of the state is you don't have any sandy beaches. It's all rocks. Ow, ow, ow, ow, ow.

SPEAKER_04 9:50

Um, you get out there about knee deep, and then it kind of smooths out a little bit. Right.

SPEAKER_00 9:54

But yeah, you're not, you're not gonna you're not gonna go over to the east side of the state and think, oh, we're gonna have a beach day, and you're used to going to Grand Haven, and then you're like, well, this is not this is not.

SPEAKER_04 10:08

Yeah, it will suck for you if you're not expecting it. Yeah, but bring some sandwich.

SPEAKER_00 10:13

Um why do you think that is? I have no idea.

SPEAKER_04 10:16

I mean, if we had scuba gear, and me and you went diving, which um if you're on Facebook, follow Chris Roxborough, R O X. He uh dives in all our great lakes. Okay, and he's got some really cool video of shit. He does the shipwrecks and stuff.

SPEAKER_01 10:32

Yeah.

SPEAKER_04 10:33

But if we were doing that, would we find that Huron is got more rocks everywhere than you mean like all the way into the deeper part? I I know it softens up, but I couldn't tell you.

SPEAKER_00 10:46

I had no idea.

SPEAKER_04 10:47

Um that's why you guys gotta like and subscribe so we can get the funds to investigate that type of stuff.

SPEAKER_00 10:54

Yeah, exactly.

SPEAKER_04 10:54

I mean you could Google it, but you're gonna trust Google.

SPEAKER_00 10:57

Well, what I'll do, and if we get to that point, what we'll do is I'll uh I'll stay on the boat and I'll send you down with a live feed camera. Yep. And I'll just see what you're seeing from the boat. Yes, because I ain't coming back.

SPEAKER_04 11:10

Yeah, that's a good thing, yeah. You already put a rope around your waist.

SPEAKER_00 11:15

If you tug three times, pull me up. Yeah.

SPEAKER_04 11:19

Was that two or three? I don't know. Wait for him to do it again.

SPEAKER_00 11:22

Oh, no. Let me tell you, if I start tugging, I'm gonna keep tugging until I start going up. Be like me jacking off. Come on, give me up, give me up.

SPEAKER_04 11:31

Which you wouldn't have to jack off if you were treated right every night.

SPEAKER_00 11:35

Well, you know.

SPEAKER_04 11:36

You know, but we're not gonna bring that up. That's just kind of borderline rude. Um, the one bar we stopped at uh the alley.

SPEAKER_00 11:46

Alley bar.

SPEAKER_04 11:47

Uh one of your buddies told us about that right now.

SPEAKER_00 11:49

That was a that was a uh recommendation. He couldn't go along, so he says, Hey, when you go, we stopped at this bar right in uh Port Sandilec.

SPEAKER_04 12:01

And it was a neat bar, but it was just different. You go to the website, you're gonna see that they did not make the recommendation list because I don't think it's worth going out of the way to go to.

SPEAKER_00 12:12

It's one of them places that you gotta go to see it once. Because we can explain it and it's not gonna be what it is. But they have Playboys. Yeah, yeah.

SPEAKER_04 12:21

There's a there's a box of them.

SPEAKER_00 12:24

Box of Playboys from anywhere from I got 1975.

SPEAKER_04 12:28

You were what, 2006? Three? Yeah. And boy did women change in that period of time.

SPEAKER_00 12:35

Who I was glad I got the newer aged one because uh Wow. I'd still be picking hair out of my teeth.

SPEAKER_04 12:42

That is just disgusting. And what some of you older cats, go ahead and you can write back to not to keep bringing up the website, but you can go right back there and you drop us a note. But how did you older gents navigate through all the brush? It stinks.

SPEAKER_00 13:06

It I don't care how clean you are. No, it has a scent.

SPEAKER_04 13:12

Yes. It's fucking disgusting.

SPEAKER_00 13:14

Yeah.

SPEAKER_04 13:15

And uh I I just don't know. Maybe they didn't eat pussy back then.

SPEAKER_00 13:20

Ah, they had to have.

SPEAKER_04 13:23

It's not a new thing. I don't know. Somebody once said, Oh that don't bother me. I once dropped a sucker on the carpet and pulled it out and ate it. Well, no, that's that's fucking gross. Uh yeah, so I'm glad we've advanced as a as a people. As a society. Yes, and we've learned to clean that shit up.

SPEAKER_00 13:42

Like, okay, so if you went over to someone's house for dinner, and they were having hamburgers on the grill, and they took a fucking handful of hair and just went bam, like Emerald Lagossi on that motherfucker. Are you gonna eat it? Fuck no. Okay, then. Yeah. I rest on my face. I mean my case.

SPEAKER_04 14:07

I don't know. No. Oh gross. Fuck. Um, I'm in the market for a new pocket knife. Yeah. Mine keeps snapping the end off because and I I I, you know, some some of you people get upset about AI, but I did use it for my knife research. Uh-huh. And uh I said, what is a good pocket knife? And then she gave me a couple options and she said, Tell me how you use it, and I'll give you a couple suggestions.

SPEAKER_00 14:37

Like a fucking screwdriver. That's why I keep breaking.

SPEAKER_04 14:39

That's what I told her. I said, a pry bar, uh zip tie cutting, um aluminum. And she's a sweetheart, she comes back.

SPEAKER_05 14:49

All the things you're not supposed to cut.

SPEAKER_04 14:51

So she said, You're not supposed to cut aluminum with a knife.

SPEAKER_05 14:54

Right.

SPEAKER_04 14:54

And she told me that. And she said, however, if you're going to abuse your tool and equipment this way, these are the four suggestions I got. So I did get four suggestions from her, and then I've been researching those. And did you know? Yeah, everybody always looks at a knife and says, Oh, nice handle. You know, what is that? Is that aluminum? Is that G10? Blah, blah, blah. Makarta, whatever, wood. Yeah, you got a lot of handle choices. That's what everybody looks at. Yeah. But the thing is, nobody gives what's the blade made out of a minute of time.

SPEAKER_00 15:25

Is it mild steel? Is it D2? Is it just carbon steel? Is it tools?

SPEAKER_04 15:32

Yeah, you got a million different kinds. But that's what makes the difference.

SPEAKER_00 15:37

Yeah. Is it case hardened?

SPEAKER_04 15:39

Yep.

SPEAKER_00 15:40

I mean, what what do you what do you want?

SPEAKER_04 15:41

You want a flipper? You want a fucking button? You want out the front? Oh my god. Fixed blade?

SPEAKER_00 15:47

I mean, what the amount of choices you've got. Do you want a tonto blade or do you want a flip?

SPEAKER_04 15:53

Oh, that's where I'm caught up right now. I don't want serrated. I hate the serrated.

SPEAKER_00 15:57

Yeah, they're because they're paying the sharpener.

SPEAKER_04 15:59

Yes. Now, that's where I get caught up now, and now that I'm actually looking. I've been happy with the little one I got. Yes. I've been happy with it, but I'm not going to buy another one because it's D2, and that's why it keeps snapping when you use it as a pry bar. Anyhow. The blades. Yes. Alright. You got the dove, I think they call that one. I can't remember. It starts with a D. And then they've got the you just said it. Uh Tonto.

SPEAKER_00 16:30

Tonto blade. All right. Well. Those are pretty sweet. I like them.

SPEAKER_04 16:33

Do you? I do. Okay. I don't have them, but I like them. And uh I I asked the girl on the computer there. She's quick too. I don't know how she does her research that fast. But uh she uh told me that, well, you said that you cut meat with your knife. That is where the I'm gonna call it dove. I know that ain't right, but the the rounded, the typical uh pointed, you know. It excels at meat cutting because it doesn't push down before it cuts. Well, however, I cut a lot of zip ties and a lot of rope. That is where your tonto blade comes in as more beneficial because it's not rounded and it doesn't push what you're cutting away from it.

SPEAKER_00 17:15

Correct.

SPEAKER_04 17:16

So I'm I'm I'm really looking at the tonneau blades right now.

SPEAKER_00 17:20

Are you talking about a drop point?

SPEAKER_04 17:21

Drop point, yes, thank you.

SPEAKER_00 17:23

Yep.

SPEAKER_04 17:23

Yep. Um, so you got your benefits, but there is not one blade out there that is 100% all arounder. No, that's why there's so many different knives. It's fucking crazy. But I'm not gonna carry fucking four knives, and I don't get up in the morning and say, hmm, today's a bad day.

SPEAKER_00 17:44

You know, I don't know what I'm gonna be getting. Every zip tie I come across, you're done.

SPEAKER_04 17:51

Yeah. I mean some days it don't even leave my pocket. Yeah. But when it does, I want the best of my options, and I've been learning a lot. I I I've I've really gotten ever since we started doing this podcast when we went to doing YouTube, I've gotten kind of like really into YouTube, so I'm watching reviews on fucking anything that I'm interested in buying. I'm watching a fuck ton of reviews, and it's so funny because that is all based on opinion too.

SPEAKER_00 18:23

Right. And I'm gonna tell you, I'm gonna I'm gonna put a little pin in your balloon on that. You have to be careful getting your reviews and research from YouTube people or any of the other are you talking about the guys that get paid or get the shit given to them? Yeah, well, I don't care if something's given to a guy if he's gonna give an honest review. And I've seen I've seen a few that do. I've seen guys that they oh, so-and-so sent me this, wants me to review it, and he says, to be honest with you, isn't it that great? Yep. So I I can respect those guys, but there's too many social media influencers out there that, in my opinion, because I can't prove it, but I think that they take something that's a hot ticket item and they do a review on it, not backed by the company, and they sabotage to make it less of what it really is, and then they will put it out there while everybody's like, oh man, so-and-so, this guy knows he he's always he he does the best reviews, blah blah. He reviewed this this gun that I want to buy, and I gotta go check out the video because he's he he knows he's the man, yeah. And then he gets reviews this gun, it runs like shit. Well, he did that, one, he did the review because he knew everybody wanted that gun reviewed, and then he purposely made it run like shit, so everybody that's got these that doesn't have any issues with it, then get on their comment. Well, it drives the comments through the roof, drives his whole thing through the roof. Drives the views up. Guess what? The more he gets action on that, the more money he makes. So if you take something that you know is good and you give it a bad review, you're gonna get all the people that have it. Oh, yeah, or interested in it, or have a friend that has it. Oh, so-and-so's got that, it runs great. I think that happened.

SPEAKER_04 20:38

You're getting it does. You're getting the attention.

SPEAKER_00 20:41

They're driving, they're they're falsely driving their views to get more clicks to get more money.

SPEAKER_04 20:48

Some would say skewing the view.

SPEAKER_00 20:49

Yeah.

SPEAKER_04 20:50

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 20:50

Yeah.

SPEAKER_04 20:51

Yeah, and they do.

SPEAKER_00 20:52

So you be careful with your YouTubes.

SPEAKER_04 20:54

Um, and that's what brings me back to the AI when I'm talking to this little girl on the other end. Where is she getting her information? She's just because a lot of her information says a lot of users say, okay. So are you Amazon? She's searching reviews, yeah.

SPEAKER_00 21:10

So Amazon, the website. But how does she do it so fucking quick? Because she's fucking good.

SPEAKER_04 21:14

It's insane. Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 21:15

Now, now that you're talking about AI, I want to bring something up.

SPEAKER_04 21:20

Bring it up.

SPEAKER_00 21:21

I'm a little pissed off.

SPEAKER_04 21:22

Oh boy. Okay. Is it because it looks like L when you read it? No. Okay.

SPEAKER_00 21:28

If the no good piece of fucking shit that did this is listening, uh. Oh. I want you to know that you can suck a fat cock. Whoever wrote on our sticker that said AI is poison at my local establishment is a piece of shit. And you can go fuck yourself.

SPEAKER_04 21:52

Yep. Twice.

SPEAKER_00 21:53

Three or four times. Because you're a loser.

SPEAKER_04 21:56

AI is poison.

SPEAKER_00 21:58

Yeah.

SPEAKER_04 21:58

Fuck you.

SPEAKER_00 21:59

I bet you. You a hundred fucking dollars if I sat down with that person that did that and went to their social media or like their TikTok.

SPEAKER_02 22:06

Oh, yeah.

SPEAKER_00 22:07

90% of the shit that they like has some sort of AI in it. So you could take your poison and jam it up your ass. Rance over. Go ahead. You're right. Sorry, I didn't mean to. Why were you blacking out our sticker?

SPEAKER_04 22:23

You could have written below it.

SPEAKER_00 22:24

Yeah.

SPEAKER_04 22:24

AI's poison.

SPEAKER_00 22:26

Or you could have been a fucking mature adult.

SPEAKER_04 22:29

And said a message.

SPEAKER_00 22:30

And just looked at it and said, no, it's not for me, and walked on. But to carry a fucking black Sharpie in your pocket in the bar bathroom, you're a piece of shit.

SPEAKER_04 22:42

When you got a black sharpie in your pocket at the bar, you went in there intending to do it on the back.

SPEAKER_00 22:47

And that goes with fucking Portageons and public restrooms of all sorts. If you carve in them fucking stalls or you write on them walls, you are a no good piece of shit. Because all that does is just make shit look stupid.

SPEAKER_04 23:03

You ever carve your name in a tree initial? No. Maybe something with an old girlfriend? No. Nothing in a tree?

unknown 23:09

No.

SPEAKER_00 23:09

No, because I think it's stupid.

SPEAKER_04 23:11

I've never tried.

SPEAKER_00 23:12

I've never tried to.

SPEAKER_04 23:13

Mostly because the tips of my knives break off, so I can't dig in.

SPEAKER_00 23:16

Like carving carving shit in picnic tables or out in public places vandalizing the shit. That that is childish, and you should fucking never do that.

SPEAKER_04 23:26

However, I do like it when you go to a bar. Um you'll find them a lot in the UP. Uh you find them a lot down by a tail of the dragon. You know, big bike or snowmobile areas, and there's a million fucking stickers in the bar. Yeah. Bathroom. I like I like that because that's cool. That is neat. But that's that's that was there for invited. Yes. For you, some asshole with a marker.

SPEAKER_00 23:48

Write on something that's not meant for that. I I just think that's that's extremely immature and distasteful. And every time I go into a fucking orange, yeah. I mean, all you're doing is just making shit look stupid. And call Katie for a good time.

SPEAKER_04 24:05

Ha ha ha ha. You know what? Any fucking dumb dick that calls that number, if you're calling it because you really think Katie's looking for a good time.

SPEAKER_00 24:14

Katie did not go into the men's bathroom and write her number down because she wants to suck every dick that she can get in her mouth. It's stupid.

SPEAKER_04 24:22

Now, if you happen to be Katie that's in the local bar and you in fact did write your number down.

SPEAKER_00 24:28

Go to perpetuarong.com, send a message immediately.

SPEAKER_04 24:33

We will call.

SPEAKER_00 24:36

You never know. No, because now you're gonna get some dumbass who go, oh, this is better yet. I can do it digitally. Because you're a fucking idiot. Oh. Okay, I'm done with my rant. Sorry.

SPEAKER_04 24:47

Fucking eh.

SPEAKER_00 24:49

Shit irritates me sometimes, you know.

SPEAKER_04 24:51

Well, it is just shit. Oh. Um, if Mike and Maida are out there, uh I'm done pit stop. Katie and Gavin. Yep. Uh any four of you are listening now. We uh it was enjoyable meeting you over the weekend.

SPEAKER_00 25:05

Uh at the Iron Horse?

SPEAKER_04 25:07

Yep. That was a good time, and I hope you guys did find your way to our page and all our other shit.

SPEAKER_00 25:12

No, they were actually really cool people.

SPEAKER_04 25:14

They were four of the best people that I have met in a long time.

SPEAKER_00 25:17

Yeah, they were awesome.

SPEAKER_04 25:18

To be honest.

SPEAKER_00 25:19

Yeah.

SPEAKER_04 25:19

You know. I I think though, really, anytime we uh get out of town, I I think we can always pick one couple or one little group of people. That was really cool.

SPEAKER_00 25:31

Yeah.

SPEAKER_04 25:31

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 25:32

Yep. And they were they were the ones.

SPEAKER_04 25:34

Yeah, they were. They were great.

SPEAKER_00 25:35

You guys won the award for the day.

SPEAKER_04 25:37

Yeah. Um, I mean, they they have two adopted kids, and the adopted kids started dating each other, but hey, you do you up in the thumb. I'm glad I asked for clarification on that.

SPEAKER_00 25:48

The way it sounds.

SPEAKER_04 25:51

So, yeah, uh, you'll figure it out. But is it okay? If uh mom adopted me and they adopted Trish.

SPEAKER_00 26:05

Yeah.

SPEAKER_04 26:05

And we grew up together, but we're adopted. Is it okay for us to do it?

SPEAKER_00 26:10

Completely acceptable, in my opinion.

SPEAKER_04 26:11

Is it? Yep. As long as you both say yes.

SPEAKER_00 26:14

Yeah.

SPEAKER_04 26:14

Yeah. Okay.

SPEAKER_00 26:16

I mean. Let's go one step further. Oh boy.

SPEAKER_04 26:21

You're adopted.

SPEAKER_00 26:22

Can you do mom? I don't think so. Well, I wasn't thinking that, but yeah, I mean, I don't see why. What were you thinking, Dad? Well, like, so a couple gets married and each one of them has a kid. Yeah. A boy and a girl. Oh, yeah. Step brother. That's step brother and sister, right? Yeah. Step, yeah, because half is full blood or half is blood. Step is is no relation whatsoever. Fucking knock the bottom out of it. I got no problem with it. I I don't know. I don't know. Why? You're not related. Okay. So. You may have spent time together. In your head. Yeah.

SPEAKER_04 27:00

In your head. All right. You're you. I'm me. I'm your stepsister over here.

SPEAKER_00 27:07

Yeah.

SPEAKER_04 27:08

Pretend I'm pretty.

SPEAKER_00 27:09

Um goddamn, you look good.

SPEAKER_04 27:11

How do you how do you even approach that? Do you like towel whipper when you guys are doing dishes and she's like, oh, that's stong. And then you just rub her butt a little bit and like, oh, let me rub that out. And then Well, you see. I mean, I'm going down the uh fucking Bang Brothers.

SPEAKER_00 27:30

So you see, this is where I become an expert. No, I do not have any step siblings. For the records. I did. No, I do not. And I've never done any. Well, I can't because I don't have any. But if I did, no. Um. So I don't want anybody to think differently of me.

SPEAKER_04 27:51

They already do.

SPEAKER_00 27:52

I know. But when I get on the old F UQ.com and I go to the categories that I go to, I didn't know I do not go to the family category or anything like that. But it just happens to be the category that I tend to go to a lot, ends up having stepbrother, stepsister porn in it. And I'm not looking at the title. I never read the title because that's I'm not jacking off words. I typically look at the little picture of all the different thumbnails. Yeah. Yeah. And uh I go out and look and see if there's a chick that catches my eye at just from a still picture, and I'm like, yep, click. And uh it never fails. It's always a fucking stepsister. It always ends up being a step-up.

SPEAKER_04 28:48

You ever end up with the stepmother that's doing the son?

SPEAKER_00 28:51

Oh, that yeah, that it's it's either the steps. Step sister or the stepmom, yeah. And uh and I'm like, yeah, see, I don't think there's anything wrong with it. You're not related.

SPEAKER_04 29:03

Okay, so you guys adopt the kid. You guys decide, you know what? We need a kid. Oh fuck, look, there's perfectly good kid to daughter to rent. Yep. Or to rent. However it works. It's not a hooker, Brad. Jesus Christ. And then uh y'all go out, uh, you know, we we go out bike riding that day, and then we all come back to the humble abode known as your house. And boy, that sounds weird. And then you see your boy screwing your adopted daughter. Is it still cool and okay?

SPEAKER_00 29:31

Well, you're looking at it from a different standpoint. You're the parent. It's not cool. Unacceptable. Because that's your I mean, you take that adopted kid as your own.

SPEAKER_04 29:42

Right.

SPEAKER_00 29:42

So now it's like, well, my son's a fucking little incest breeding motherfucker. So it's different. Okay. You gotta go from perspective.

SPEAKER_04 29:52

Right. That's interesting. Yeah. Boy, you know, a psychologist would just have a fucking field day with you.

SPEAKER_00 30:01

Well, I ain't going. Um but anyway, to answer your question, how you initiate that. Yes. In the porns I watch, a lot of them, you know, they'll be hanging out in the bedroom, and the brother'll act shy and ask his sister for girlfriend advice, and one thing leads to another, and he's like, Well, I've never had sex before, I don't know what to do. And she's like, Well, I can show you, and then boom. Yeah.

SPEAKER_04 30:31

Next thing you know, or his dick slapping her in the face, and see, but I feel bad for all these stepdaughters out there, or half-daughters, whatever, because if they watch that stuff, they're expecting their stepbrother to have a 12-inch hog. Yeah, true, you know, and then all of a sudden she finally works up the nerve to get with stepbrother, and it's like, oh what the fuck? Is that hard? You know, does that throw them off too? I I don't know. I mean, because you know, you fucking ankles up behind the ears getting pile drived in the ass. That's what young men grow up thinking is normal.

SPEAKER_01 31:10

Right.

SPEAKER_04 31:10

Turns out it's only normal if you find the other half to that. Ah, yeah.

SPEAKER_00 31:19

Well, well, what about the ones where it's the stepdad? Oh, yeah. Kind of pickle you get yourself into there. Or the coach. Yeah, I've seen that one.

SPEAKER_04 31:29

Yeah, I like those two. Fuck, I might go down to LCC's if I can coach rackable. Yeah. Why not? Why do you want the job? You got a ball problem. Um, the ones that do bother me though, really like seriously bother me, is when you see this chick just getting railed from behind, uh-huh. And then they move camera angle, and whoa, that's not a chick at all. That's another dude getting it.

SPEAKER_00 32:03

Oh, I have not experienced that.

SPEAKER_04 32:04

Oh, that will that will make you shut down the website for a couple of days.

SPEAKER_00 32:09

Goddamn tranny.

SPEAKER_04 32:10

Yep. You don't don't do that.

SPEAKER_00 32:12

That you that that should have beginning of the video. I cannot say there probably is. You just didn't read it.

SPEAKER_04 32:19

There might be.

SPEAKER_00 32:21

I've never uh never come across that one.

SPEAKER_04 32:24

Yeah, it's definitely thank God for that. Yeah, well, you wait, it'll come. Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 32:27

Your boner went deer-poo. Come on, little buddy. No, it's a dude.

SPEAKER_04 32:35

Yeah, it's no.

SPEAKER_02 32:37

Um, we got that on the took that down to dirty town right away.

SPEAKER_04 32:46

Um, so yeah. Uh as uh I'm back to where I started with the the drop point and the tonneaux. I uh am going through all this stuff. Nah, the shit's gotten a lot a lot expensive, more expensive than what it should be, um, just because the way everything is. And I'm looking around and it's funny because I'm thinking to myself. And I think you're really good at doing this too. Yeah, I go so and buying some bullshit and just totally justifying why you bought it. Oh, yeah. Even at the same time in your head, you're like, God, can I still return that?

SPEAKER_00 33:25

I am the king of that. Um give you a little example of that.

SPEAKER_04 33:31

I'll take that.

SPEAKER_00 33:32

Last year, uh, we were at BJ's, the wholesale club. Um, and we I got this bad habit of going down the electronics aisle. Oh, yeah. I have no fucking business down that aisle. What'd you buy? It was the move the outside movie theater, the projector, the big inflatable uh screen, the whole nine yards. And I looked at it, and they fucking coals my ass. Regular 250, 249 or whatever, on sale for 179. And I'm like, wait a minute. This motherfucker's got a projector, it's got an inflatable, and the screen that clips on the inflatable, and a Bluetooth speaker. For 159? 179, I think. 179. And I'm like, I gotta have that.

SPEAKER_04 34:20

That seems like too good a deal.

SPEAKER_00 34:22

Yeah, I thought so too, but I had to have it.

SPEAKER_04 34:25

Oh, it's a good deal.

SPEAKER_00 34:27

So I told Kelly, I says, we gotta get that. We gotta get that. For what? I says, for outside movies. For all the outside movies we don't. And she's like, No, we don't need that. I says, no, we do. Like, absolutely we need it. And so I get it. Throw it in the cart. She says, Ah, just that's a waste of money. I said, It's only 179 bucks. I said it's regular 250. She's like, whatever. And you know, she's she knows that once I set my mind to it, it's it's gonna happen.

SPEAKER_04 35:03

So unless I fight.

SPEAKER_00 35:05

I'm gonna do movies at the campground for the kids. It's for the kids. Oh, yeah. I need it right there. Then she shut up about it.

SPEAKER_04 35:14

And how many times did you get it out?

SPEAKER_00 35:16

Uh a few times last summer, and then uh we did it 4th of July week this year? Yep.

SPEAKER_04 35:21

It worked good.

SPEAKER_00 35:22

Oh, yeah. Yeah. It takes a little dicking around and get everything set up, but my brother-in-law Jason, he usually helps me uh with everything. And he, I mean, he's he's he thinks it's great, so he's he's right there. Oh, yep, let's get that going. He says, I'll help you out. And he helps me clip the screen up and set the uh what part's inflatable? Well, it's a it's like a big tubular inflatable deal. And then it's got clips on it. Quick clips with a screen there that holds the screen. Oh, okay. Yeah, 120 inch screen.

SPEAKER_04 35:52

And the projector is bright enough to run 120 inches.

SPEAKER_00 35:55

Yeah, yeah. Oh yeah. It actually does a really good job.

SPEAKER_04 35:58

So honestly, you've got your money worth.

SPEAKER_00 36:00

Yes. Yeah, it's already it's already been worth the money.

SPEAKER_04 36:03

Well, that's good. And it was for the kids. Well, justification. If it's for the kids, it's right. You gotta do it. Yeah. That's what I always say. Do everything for the kids. I'm gonna start using that. I'm gonna use that. It's for the kids. Argue with me now. Why are you getting that? It's for the kids.

SPEAKER_00 36:20

Why'd you go out and buy a bench made knife? It's for the kids.

SPEAKER_04 36:23

Yeah. Every now and then they come to me and I gotta cut something. Yeah. I was gonna get a micro tech, but who doesn't spend a truck payment on a fucking knife? I mean, I've had this fucking $48 fucking Civivi in my pocket for three years now. You give me a $500 benchmade, guess what's getting lost? The bench made tomorrow.

SPEAKER_00 36:46

That's just like a pair of sunglasses. I used to be all about buying Oakley's and having really nice sunglasses. The fuckers get scratched almost instantly. Oh, you can't take care of them? No.

SPEAKER_04 36:59

And uh I've had mine for it's 26. I've had mine six years now. Yeah. And I finally got to buy a new pair because they're terrible.

SPEAKER_00 37:06

Yeah, I saw that Saturday. Um, but no, I the sunglasses, they're not worth spending money on.

SPEAKER_04 37:13

I th I I think so. I get you get the glass lens polarized. Oh my god. It's like seeing a brand new you got a whole new view on life. It's like you put those on, you know what people go through when they get cataract surgery.

SPEAKER_00 37:25

Oh my god, you're fucking out of it.

SPEAKER_04 37:27

Oh my god, I can see again. No. Yep.

SPEAKER_00 37:29

No, you can buy cheap ones that look just. Yes, you can. Okay, whatever.

SPEAKER_04 37:34

You get your cheap ones, I'll get my saying as clear.

SPEAKER_00 37:40

They're fucking crystal clear.

SPEAKER_04 37:42

Not if I had better film equipment, uh-huh. We would do a side-by-side comparison test and we'd measure the filaments and the prisms and the parallaxes and yeah, I'd show you that my eyes are how much healthier than the average person's eyes from using. Yep. Yeah. Fuck it. People out there agree with me.

SPEAKER_00 38:09

Well, they don't. You think they do. They do. Until they start letting us know they agree with you. I'm gonna go ahead and stick to my story.

SPEAKER_04 38:17

And start letting me know. Hey, Brad, we agree with you. And do it on the uh website so Bob can see it too. Oh, that's fine too. You'll let us know. Yeah. Nobody ever I get a few texts after every show, you know. Hey, this was good. Hey, this was horseshit. Hey, um Justin Schaefer, uh, you haven't met him yet. Uh pretty good kid. He uh Via the website said you guys should put together an Oktoberfest party and invite all your friends and their families to outdoor games, a bar, some food. And uh if anybody's trying we gotta work out the details. Okay, the cool kids uh Justin, what can we count on you for? Um, anything we need, I think. Uh so that's another thing. We're gonna need some replies back on that. Like if you do it, I don't care. Call, text, fucking email, whatever you want to do, but we we don't like setting shit up if there's no interest. Right. So let us know if it's interested and we'll do it. Yeah. And it's always fun getting people together.

unknown 39:24

Yeah.

SPEAKER_04 39:25

You know, and that's what bothers me. And that's why I like, I'll tell you what, Bob, you wanna know? People say, Brad, why you go riding around with Bob all summer long on the bikes? And uh first time I was asked, I actually sat down that night, couldn't sleep because I was thinking. Oh, oh, it was weighing on you. It was weighing on me. And I'll tell you why. Because we can go places, the four of us, and we'll pull in somewhere and we will fucking make a friend. Or friends.

SPEAKER_00 39:54

Almost almost every time.

SPEAKER_04 39:55

Almost every time.

SPEAKER_00 39:56

Yeah.

SPEAKER_04 39:57

And it's always fun like that. Well, a lot of people like uh when we threw together that bike ride, uh that one that left Powham. Well, who's gonna be there? I got a lot of that.

SPEAKER_00 40:07

Who the fuck? Who the fuck cares?

SPEAKER_04 40:09

You're spending it with us. Yeah, let's just. Right. Um, a lot of people get caught up in hey, I hang out with the same four people day in, day out, and I get nervous around new people. Well, you're nervous around new people because you never get around new people.

SPEAKER_00 40:25

Right.

SPEAKER_04 40:25

There's a lot of good people out there, a lot of fucking assholes.

SPEAKER_00 40:28

Well, there's no shortage of assholes. No.

SPEAKER_04 40:30

But there's a lot of good people.

SPEAKER_00 40:32

Yep. And we seem to attract them.

SPEAKER_04 40:35

We do. Usually because they're overhearing us. Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 40:42

Or we tend we do tend to, and it's more me than it is you. It is a lot of me. I'll take this, but we uh we tend to get boisterous. Um insert ourselves in other people's conversations. Well, this is true. Whether they asked for it or not. Yeah. Um in fact, that's how we got talking to Mike and May.

SPEAKER_04 41:03

Because Grumpy Old Man.

SPEAKER_00 41:04

Yep, grumpy old man. We were they were at the picnic table next to us. We started talking, they were talking, and of course I overheard something, so I fucking spin around, fucking snap my neck and comment on it. And some people don't like that.

SPEAKER_04 41:18

No, some people get a little touchy, but you um you know that right away. But I don't care.

SPEAKER_00 41:22

Yeah, like I'm gonna I'm gonna try it once, see, and if you're receptive, then I'm gonna strike up a conversation with you.

SPEAKER_04 41:27

If you don't like it, you best just grab your plates and move.

SPEAKER_00 41:30

Yeah, because uh working stay. I am the most persistent motherfucker I know.

SPEAKER_04 41:37

Yep, you don't like me, I'll make you like me.

SPEAKER_00 41:39

Yeah, yeah. I will come right over there and sit right next to you until you like me.

unknown 41:43

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 41:44

Until I got Kelly.

SPEAKER_04 41:45

Well, I don't doubt that. Yeah. Chase her around the ball field a few times. I'll chase her anywhere she goes. Bringing home an old dog.

SPEAKER_00 41:53

Mm-hmm. Well, she does tell everybody that I'm a rescue, so. Well, I don't doubt that. Pick me up at the pound.

SPEAKER_04 42:02

I have noticed a bit of a changing of the guard as far as uh my relationship goes. Have you noticed that I've been not slowing down, but not speeding up with my drinking when we're out?

SPEAKER_01 42:16

Uh-huh.

SPEAKER_04 42:16

But the uh wifey there, she dropped the brick on that gas pedal, especially last Saturday.

SPEAKER_00 42:22

Somebody put the nitrous button in her. Oh, yes.

SPEAKER_04 42:26

But I and that's fine. I enjoy it. Yeah, I don't know. Poking fun at nothing.

SPEAKER_00 42:31

She's a lot of fun. And when she gets going a little bit and she gets a little sauced up, she's tends to be even a little more fun. So honestly, I think it's good for you.

SPEAKER_04 42:39

It is, it is. It's a good time. It just uh cracks me up because damn.

SPEAKER_00 42:46

It used to be trash, trash, now it's brand, I like it.

SPEAKER_04 42:53

Oh, yeah. It's always a good time. Uh we'll keep stacksing you over there. Oh, it's some spam. Yeah. Um thinking about starting a new bank account. Yeah. Just a trash bank account with five dollars in it. Okay. And then applying for one of those $75,000, $300 a month payment loans that are. Oh, the ones that keep coming through on the phones. Yeah. I'm thinking about doing that because what are you gonna do? Take my five dollars?

SPEAKER_00 43:18

Yeah. If it works, let me know. Right. If it works, I'm in.

SPEAKER_04 43:22

I mean, that's a sweet deal, but I I just can't believe that people are doing that shit.

SPEAKER_00 43:30

Um fuck, I had something I was gonna say and I don't remember what it was. I hate when that happens.

SPEAKER_04 43:37

Well, I'll tell you, um it's the what they call the teenth weekend of July. And every year for like twenty five years, my uh in laws and shit, and they they get with some friends and they go up north to one of their friends' cottages every year on J July teenth weekend. And uh so that's where we're at this this weekend. And when I got home last night, I was looking at the lawn.

SPEAKER_00 44:04

And uh Ricardo's been slipping.

SPEAKER_04 44:06

I hope Ricardo comes back a day early, because that shit's getting long.

SPEAKER_00 44:10

Ricardo, get your ass back home. Vacation's over. That lawn's gotta get to cut itself. It's just like a dick. It ain't gonna suck itself. No, sir.

SPEAKER_04 44:20

I'm gonna go out there last night, but it's just too fucking hot.

SPEAKER_00 44:24

Oh my God.

SPEAKER_04 44:25

I was gonna mow, but nope.

SPEAKER_00 44:26

It was.

SPEAKER_04 44:27

Um I haven't even been riding the bike this week because the fucking I don't like it when it's that hot.

SPEAKER_00 44:34

It's you know, I've been thinking about riding to work.

SPEAKER_04 44:38

You should. It's good for you.

SPEAKER_00 44:40

Well, it is, and I really want to. But I just I I when I almost hit the two deer last year, I said, never again. I'm not doing it, not gonna happen. But I'm like, man, I really want to ride. Like it, I just want to ride to work. Yeah. Plus, it's way cheaper. Oh wow. And Monday morning, Monday or Tuesday, I think it was Monday. Monday morning, I'm on my way to work. Yeah, that's what my truck sounded like because I was gouging. Um but uh fucking pig. I turn onto the road that I work on, and I only gotta go like maybe a mile down that road, not even a mile. Fucking hit another fucking deer. That's four fucking deer. Monday you did? Yeah. Four fucking deer I've hit with my truck going to work.

SPEAKER_05 45:35

Don't do that on a bike.

SPEAKER_00 45:37

No, that's why and so then it was like, yep, nope. Scratch that idea. I don't give a fuck how many deer I hit with a truck. I'm not wanting to fucking do it with my bike.

SPEAKER_04 45:46

I'm not gonna say anything because I don't want to fuck myself over. Uh-huh. But uh, it's been a while since I've Yeah, don't say just shut it. You know what I mean? Just shut it. Yeah. Fuck. It gets old.

SPEAKER_00 46:00

Hey, you know what's this weekend?

SPEAKER_04 46:02

Muskegan.

SPEAKER_00 46:03

Bike time. Rebel Road. Rebel Road. All in the same fucking time. Yeah. And did you know? No, I didn't. Tell me.

SPEAKER_04 46:11

I've gone to that for several years. Here and there, not every year in a row necessarily. But Rebel Road and Bike Time are two different events.

SPEAKER_00 46:21

Correct.

SPEAKER_04 46:24

Who knew? Well, you did.

SPEAKER_00 46:26

I've only gotten like three times.

SPEAKER_04 46:28

So Rebel Road is what's downtown. Correct. Bike time is what the hot rod does. Yes. Okay. Why don't they just come together? Yeah. And then they can have better concerts. They could have. Oh, I don't know. Here's an idea. Anheuser Busch product, maybe once in a while somewhere. The beer tent, Hot Rod Harley, you guys do a great job. Yes, they have. I get my bush lights there. The girls get their neutrals, their cart, whatever.

SPEAKER_00 46:56

Yep.

SPEAKER_04 46:57

Hands down, great beer tent.

SPEAKER_00 46:59

Absolutely. Great entertainment. And the people working are always happy.

SPEAKER_04 47:04

So I was wondering, are they the wives of all the workers? I don't know. I'm going to ask this year if I remember. Okay. I've been wanting to ask a couple of times now.

SPEAKER_05 47:13

Yeah.

SPEAKER_04 47:13

But that is great because there's something for everybody to drink there. Now you get down there on Rebel Road and you pay hell getting a good beer.

SPEAKER_00 47:22

Well, that you got the craft beers and the fucking microbrews and the fucking. Yeah. No, I agree. But yeah. Muskegon bike rally. That is a good time. That's this weekend. We're going to ride out there and do that.

SPEAKER_04 47:38

I don't think it's big enough for me to go to on Wednesday and stage the weekend. No, no. What the fuck do you do for four days? You see the same shit every day. Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 47:50

Yep.

SPEAKER_04 47:51

I looked up who's playing at the uh on the stage there, and I didn't recognize any of their names.

SPEAKER_00 47:57

You know what I'm looking forward to?

SPEAKER_04 47:59

Uh bikini contest. Yep. Yeah. But last year it wasn't too hot.

SPEAKER_00 48:06

Temperature-wise it was. Yeah.

SPEAKER_04 48:07

Temperature-wise it was. Talent-wise. Yeah, we should have had Carhartt Day.

SPEAKER_00 48:12

There was a couple of them that were like toy armors. Yeah. Yeah. But some of the others. Don't put your clothes back up. Yeah. Yeah.

SPEAKER_04 48:22

Let me get you a beach towel. Yeah. Yeah. Or cover ups. Yeah. What do they call them things? Them hijabis? Something like that. Yeah. Yeah. The fucking thing.

SPEAKER_00 48:33

But yeah, no, we got we got bike time coming up this weekend.

SPEAKER_04 48:36

Um that's always fun to go out to for the day. Yep.

SPEAKER_00 48:38

I don't know who's going along with us.

SPEAKER_04 48:40

A lot of ifs, buts, candy and nuts.

SPEAKER_00 48:42

Yeah. If if if if if it's if ifs ifs and buts were candy and nuts, every day would be a Christmas elevator.

SPEAKER_04 48:49

Yes, it would be. Um that took a lot to get out. And it's even tougher now because a lot of people are going to say, well, I don't know, because I was looking at the weather.

SPEAKER_03 48:57

Well, it's going to be smoky. There's a 55% chance of rain. Well, you know what? My wife said it's bad for me to inhale that.

unknown 49:02

Yeah.

SPEAKER_04 49:03

Yeah, you're smoking fucking cigars in a pack of smokes a day. I don't think the smoke's.

SPEAKER_00 49:06

And you're eating your hairy pussy.

SPEAKER_04 49:07

Right. You sick fuck. Fuck. So no wonder its breath always stinks. Yeah, I don't. I don't know. Uh the weather was supposed to be shit tomorrow. Yeah, that cleared up. And it's going to clear up on Saturday. It's going to go away. Oh, we got the lug knot game tomorrow. Oh, yeah. Yeah. Take me out to the ball game. Yeah.

unknown 49:30

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 49:30

Who are they playing, do you know?

SPEAKER_04 49:32

Yeah. Baseball team. Oh. Yep. I ain't got a clue. I'd love it if it was the white caps because everybody likes a good lug knot white cap game. Yeah, it's like a rivalry, isn't it? Yeah. Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 49:45

The fucking big wave will come over. Throw a yagbolter! Lagbolt at him.

SPEAKER_04 49:49

Fuck yeah.

SPEAKER_00 49:51

The old fucking white cap mascot will come over and pumble the fucking purple dinosaur. God damn right. Or whatever the fuck he is. It's probably a chameleon.

SPEAKER_05 50:01

I don't fucking know. What is he?

SPEAKER_00 50:02

I think he's he's got to be a dinosaur.

SPEAKER_04 50:04

I think he's a dinosaur, yeah. But I don't know why he's a dinosaur either. That don't go with lug nuts either.

SPEAKER_00 50:09

Neither does a fucking lag bolt.

SPEAKER_04 50:11

What I would have, I would have a person, and they'd the uniform would be or the the the mascot uniform would be built out of like a hula hoop with a little paper mache making it a big fucking lug nut.

SPEAKER_00 50:25

That would make sense. Yeah. And you could have your purple dinosaur inside the lug nut.

unknown 50:29

Right.

SPEAKER_04 50:30

There you go.

SPEAKER_00 50:31

Yeah. Whoever's in charge of the marketing there.

SPEAKER_04 50:34

Give us a call. We'll help you.

SPEAKER_00 50:35

Pump their fucking head. That's for sure. For sure. Um. Have you had any good emails lately?

SPEAKER_04 50:48

We haven't had shit for emails. Uh I've gotten uh yeah, just the emails I've been getting, they haven't been criticizing. They've just been like, hey, that was, and I don't remember, you know, throughout the last several weeks we've gotten quite a few emails, but it's just like they're talking about, hey, that part was funny. Hey, I really like this part. Um, I like it when people send them in and say good things, yeah, but I prefer when they have a little complaint to it, yeah, just so I know so we can laugh at you for being sensitive. What wrinkled your lips?

SPEAKER_00 51:22

Yeah. Uh speaking of that, was it was it Denny a while back that we were going off grid and fucking run rambling on?

SPEAKER_04 51:30

Yeah, he's uh trash motherfucker.

SPEAKER_00 51:33

Well, you know, Denny fired up my oldest brother Mac, and Mac don't think we can handle it, but he wants to come out and live off the grid with us for the week, too, because he thinks that we're gonna fail.

SPEAKER_04 51:46

And then what the fuck's he gonna do? If we're failing, you know he's gonna be starving. You know, he don't know how to fucking catch a fucking wild fish in his hands.

SPEAKER_00 51:54

Right, right.

SPEAKER_04 51:55

Yeah. Do you know how to flay a fish?

SPEAKER_00 51:57

Yeah.

SPEAKER_04 51:57

Okay.

SPEAKER_00 51:58

Yeah.

SPEAKER_04 51:58

Not very good, but when we're hungry enough, I will. Yeah, okay, because I've never been good at cutting fish.

SPEAKER_00 52:05

And I'm gonna have my cell phone just in case. Well, you're gonna die if you don't get to play your Monopoly game.

SPEAKER_04 52:10

That ain't a lie. Yeah. Um do you see we got the application page too for uh be a guest? For guests, yeah.

SPEAKER_00 52:16

So if you think you've got it in you, because I'm sick and fucking tired of hearing this. You should put us on. Yeah, put us on the show. We're we could we're funny, blah, blah, blah. We could we could make your show go really good. Blah, blah, blah. Maybe you could. Maybe.

SPEAKER_04 52:31

But in twelve hundred and fifty words or less, tell us why.

SPEAKER_00 52:35

Yeah. Attach a photo. And don't use no fucking chat GPT to fucking make your No, we'll sniff that out in a second. Yeah, because you're a pro.

SPEAKER_04 52:44

Yep. And if you're uh not good looking and you gotta attach your ladies' photo, that's fine too.

SPEAKER_00 52:49

Yeah.

SPEAKER_04 52:50

Actually, I'd do that because that'd probably get you a better chance of. Um okay, so that brings me into a thought. Oh boy. We're at a party, a gathering, a social thing. And everybody's getting a little liquored up, and the girls all of a sudden decide that they are going to go out in the room, and all you're gonna see is basically above their belly button and below their collarbone. Uh-huh. Just boobs. Yeah. Okay. And I know I can, but how many guys do you think would pick out the correct boobage? Or move the screen down, the front parts or the ass. How many guys do you think would pick out the correct wife slash girlfriend? I know I could. Yeah, I could too. That's yeah. I mean, but do you think everybody can?

SPEAKER_00 53:57

I mean, hell. I could probably name each one of them.

SPEAKER_04 54:04

That would be funny. Oh my god. Now that would be the thing to do, write down who you think is who.

SPEAKER_01 54:09

Yeah.

SPEAKER_04 54:09

And then we all s then we drop the mask and oh that's yeah. I'm looking at the mask different now.

SPEAKER_00 54:16

Yeah.

SPEAKER_04 54:17

Well, you think the girls could pick it out by deck?

SPEAKER_00 54:20

No. Really? I don't know. Maybe. I guess I don't know. I don't look at decks, I'm not sure.

SPEAKER_04 54:26

I think they could.

SPEAKER_00 54:27

Yeah.

SPEAKER_04 54:28

I mean Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 54:29

Well, I know Kelly could pick mine out because the motherfucker's crooked.

SPEAKER_04 54:35

You're just off to the left or right.

SPEAKER_00 54:37

It's got a chicane in it. Okay. It curves, comes back, and then straightens out. Now what if makes it feel wider?

SPEAKER_04 54:46

Now, what if they were scoring them and you didn't score as high as you thought you would? Would you be mad? Because somebody next to you had a better look. Is there a straighter one or a bigger one? Just a better looking all around. I I don't know what people look for when they look at them. I don't either.

SPEAKER_00 55:04

I'd be uh be a little emotional. Would you? Yeah. That's my little buddy. She thinks you're ugly. Oh. You're not ugly, little guy.

SPEAKER_04 55:18

I mean, they are though. They are disgusting looking.

SPEAKER_00 55:20

You look like a penis, just smaller. Smaller. It's not your fault.

SPEAKER_04 55:26

That's genetics. Um feet, I'd have a harder time with. Bare feet?

SPEAKER_00 55:35

No, I could pick out Kelly's.

SPEAKER_04 55:37

Could you?

SPEAKER_00 55:37

Yeah. Okay.

SPEAKER_04 55:39

Yeah. Feet would yeah, that'd be hard. How about knees? If all you saw was just the kneecap.

SPEAKER_00 55:46

I still think I could. I've explored every inch of that body.

SPEAKER_04 55:51

We're gonna have to do that. I know a lot of chicks won't get out their boobs or asses, but they'll get out their knees.

SPEAKER_00 55:56

Sessies.

SPEAKER_04 55:57

I yeah, fucking quitters. But we shouldn't do that with the knees. Yeah. I don't know. I'm confident. Hey, we'll bring that game out to the yard if we have an Oktoberfest. Yes. That way it's PG for the kids.

SPEAKER_00 56:14

Yeah.

SPEAKER_04 56:15

Yeah. Niece.

SPEAKER_00 56:17

Yeah.

SPEAKER_04 56:17

With a K in front of him. Not niece.

SPEAKER_00 56:20

And if if there's a chick that's got pretty callused up knees. You know it ain't your wife. Nope.

SPEAKER_04 56:29

But you can see who I'm gonna be buying a beer for. Or two. Yeah. Hey, I show you that dark lip porch in the back. People really do do that. I've heard.

SPEAKER_00 56:43

She's got grass stains on her knees.

SPEAKER_04 56:47

Um get back to oh.

SPEAKER_01 56:51

What?

SPEAKER_04 56:52

That's something I want to bring up. Today. Come on. There you go. Today we were averaging 6.8 cigarettes. The smoke scale?

SPEAKER_00 57:04

Per what time?

SPEAKER_04 57:06

Per day.

SPEAKER_00 57:06

But how many hours did you have to be out in it? Um like I I mean you you gotta have more detail. If you're gonna if you're gonna fucking bring something up on the show, I need you to have more research and details on it.

SPEAKER_04 57:19

If you're out there for four hours out of doors for four hours today, it does not say that. We just made that up. We were at 6.8. Well, there's gotta be something like that. I don't know.

SPEAKER_00 57:35

You know, if bullshit was music, you'd have a full brass man. That's what my grandpa always told me.

SPEAKER_04 57:42

Okay, your city is air, cigarettes you smoke. On average, selected eight cities like smoking 14 cigarettes a day. Yeah, that one doesn't say how long you're outside either. Yeah. You know, I wish I would have thought of that. I would have asked earlier. That's kind of curious.

SPEAKER_00 57:57

So talking about callused up knees or scraped up grass-stained knees, um, you brought this up on Saturday. And you asked what that meant. Do you care to talk about that? Grass knees? Not not grass, but Oh shit. What happened to my leg?

SPEAKER_04 58:18

Oh, yeah. Jesus Christ. Jesus Christ. Um, so I got these three fingers, and this finger took took a hell of a hit right right there. This finger took a hell of a hit right there. This finger? Perfectly good. So I've been wondering for quite ah four or five weeks.

SPEAKER_00 58:41

I just figured it out.

SPEAKER_04 58:42

Go ahead. I know what it really is what the fuck happened to these that this little guy wasn't involved in. Well, Kelly, she says, my sister has an explanation for that. And I says, Yeah, what's that? And she said, Katie calls them UPBs, unexplained party bruises. Everybody's woke up. Not so hot and don't know what the fuck happened. Yeah. I I'd crack me up. I've never heard of that. You just tore another pen apart.

SPEAKER_00 59:13

No, I didn't. That's the same way. Oh, okay. So how do you think it happened? I got I I it it just light bulb come on. I know. You got all the answers. Okay. Hold them fingers up. Hold your fingers up again. Okay. This one and this one were in this manner. This one was in this manner. I think. I don't even think I know. And I wasn't there, but I know. You had your finger in a place behind your truck with Trisha.

SPEAKER_03 59:55

Okay.

SPEAKER_00 59:57

Tailgate was down. Okay. You hoisted her up on the tailgate, and you caught them two fingers because this one was hiding. Where are you, little buddy? That's exactly what happened. That could be. It is. I know for a fact. I know them kind of marks. I know the way hands work. That's exactly what it was. So she won't remember.

SPEAKER_04 1:00:25

No, she won't.

SPEAKER_00 1:00:26

Because she was T-dosed up. And you don't remember because you were all bushlighted out. And you guys were having a moment with one another.

SPEAKER_04 1:00:35

And I had that one buried.

SPEAKER_00 1:00:36

Mm-hmm. It was hiding.

SPEAKER_04 1:00:38

Yep.

unknown 1:00:40

Yep.

SPEAKER_04 1:00:41

You know what? On my way home tonight. I'm getting close. I'm gonna say, hey, I'm about ready to pull into the driveway. Get out here and get out here now. Pound a bottle of Tito's real quick. Yeah. So yeah, then you don't question anything. You know what? That could be. Or I could have been doing something kind of like this here, a little unorthodox, but that way you feel the stride. And she might have coughed and clinched.

SPEAKER_00 1:01:10

Now you're stretching. Now you're stretching. I think that's what happened.

unknown 1:01:15

Huh.

SPEAKER_04 1:01:15

I'm gonna try that tonight.

SPEAKER_00 1:01:16

Yeah.

SPEAKER_04 1:01:17

And when I come back and these two are fucked up and this one's not, Bob, you're right. Yeah. Because I gotta do it with the other hand.

SPEAKER_00 1:01:24

Can you take a video of it? Yeah, yeah. For research purposes.

SPEAKER_04 1:01:28

Yep. We'll slow her down frame by frame. This is where you went wrong. And we'll circle it like John Madden used to be a bit more on.

SPEAKER_00 1:01:35

Yep. I'm coming.

SPEAKER_04 1:01:47

Yep. That's when I smashed my finger.

SPEAKER_00 1:01:49

It wouldn't have been that fast, though.

SPEAKER_04 1:01:53

Well, I'm a pretty quick screamer. Even in slow-mo.

SPEAKER_00 1:01:56

I heard that about you. You're a screamer.

SPEAKER_04 1:01:58

I talk really fast a lot of times, so if people do slow it down, they can understand me just fine. That's over at Alice and Evans the other night. And Evans gotten into these oh no, those. The what are they called? No, no, no. Yeah. Yeah, actually, is that the wild berry? Yep.

SPEAKER_00 1:02:18

Take two or small. What are they called? Velo. Velo? Velo. Velo, Velo. I say velo. It only has one L, but it's Velo to me.

SPEAKER_04 1:02:28

He's got no less than 42 different flavors stacked on his microwave. And I said, you know what? It's like a dealer's choice. There's a day where I would have said, Jesus Christ, dude, you got a problem. But after trying the wild berry there Saturday, they're pretty good. I think that's the way to do it. Buy every flavor so you can go right around the fucking fruit rainbow.

SPEAKER_00 1:02:50

So I'm holding it up to the camera if you're watching and not listening. Velo wildberry. It's the purple.

SPEAKER_04 1:02:57

Is that French? I have no idea.

SPEAKER_00 1:02:59

But it's nine milligrams of nicotine. I wish they were a little stronger. But that's your nines, too. Yep. Um, but I'm telling you, they got really good flavor. It's refreshing. It's a good mixer. You you you know, you do the winter green all day long, and you're like, meh, I want a treat. So then you put the yeah. And for the people that aren't watching or listening, we're talking about uh nicotine pouches.

SPEAKER_04 1:03:25

You do the white girl or all day long, and then you see an Asian walk by and you're like, hmm, I need a special treat. You got turned sideways. Yeah. Is that true?

unknown 1:03:33

No.

SPEAKER_04 1:03:34

You don't think so?

SPEAKER_00 1:03:35

I've never I guess I've never had one, so I can't confirm.

SPEAKER_04 1:03:39

And all the ones you see in porn, well, they got surgerated, so make them look normal.

SPEAKER_00 1:03:46

I don't know, the ones you're looking at on porn have dicks.

SPEAKER_04 1:03:48

No, that just happened one time, and I yeah.

SPEAKER_00 1:03:52

And you're like, I'm gonna save that to the favorites right there.

SPEAKER_04 1:03:55

You know? Reddit, I got a bunch of save saved shit in my Reddit. I can't find my saved. You have to be on a computer.

SPEAKER_00 1:04:02

Oh, I didn't even I didn't know you saved stuff on Reddit.

SPEAKER_04 1:04:04

I'd oh yeah. I I got a yeah I got a cachet of that'll take your breath away. Fucking all the way back. Yeah, wow.

SPEAKER_00 1:04:17

Um you know, speaking of fucked up things like like that.

SPEAKER_04 1:04:22

I like it when you look at me and say, speaking of fucked up things, talking about you.

SPEAKER_00 1:04:28

Um we've been we've had a little bit of downtime in the everyday hustle and bustle of life, because baseball ended, football is starting up, but it's very limited at this point.

SPEAKER_04 1:04:44

Which is good.

SPEAKER_00 1:04:45

Um so we've been home a little bit more, and she's been watching she's watched it for years, but we go so long.

SPEAKER_04 1:04:54

90-day fiance? Yes. Yeah, yeah.

SPEAKER_00 1:04:58

So they're all older episodes because we like I said, we don't watch TV very much.

SPEAKER_04 1:05:03

Oh, those aren't new?

SPEAKER_00 1:05:04

No. Oh, okay. No, I don't even know what year they're from, but there's the 90-day fiance, and then there's the 90 days after, and then there's the 90-day this and 90-day that. They got all about 14 different 90-day deals. And um so we've been she watches them. I sit there.

SPEAKER_04 1:05:28

And they can be entertained.

SPEAKER_00 1:05:30

If if I say I'm not watching it or caught up in it, I'd be lying. I do watch it because I just look at the fucking stupidity that happens on these shows. And granted, everybody's thinking, oh, you know, it's just reality TV, it's all made up. Yes, some is I do agree that most all of it is put on for entertainment purposes.

SPEAKER_04 1:06:00

But well, you gotta sell it.

SPEAKER_00 1:06:03

What what the one that gets me the most is the people that are from the United States that go to these other countries to find these significant others. And like you're going, you're a perfectly good looking woman, and you go to a third world country looking for love. You're gonna get like w what what do you think is really gonna happen in that situation? The motherfucker's all head over heels for you. One, because you're a fucking smoking hot chick from the States. And two, they want their free ride here in America. But there are other ones on the flip side of that that are uglier than a sack of assholes, and they go to Nigeria or or whatever third world country it is, and they find the love of their life. That motherfucker's fucking 42 different women in his country while you're exclusive together.

SPEAKER_04 1:07:16

Gonna bring home a disease.

SPEAKER_00 1:07:17

But all he wants to do is get his visa so he can come over here. He's gonna marry you, come over here, and then fucking leave you because he's in.

SPEAKER_04 1:07:26

Had a guy I used to work with did that. He went to uh sister, sister, sister, mom, aunt. Oh. From the Philippines. Kept it right in the family. Yes. They'd come over. Oh my god, you're so great. I'm not gonna say his name. Please don't. No. He did that. And I mean, he's pretty old. Still working because he blew all his fucking money on the Filipinos.

SPEAKER_00 1:07:51

Yeah.

SPEAKER_04 1:07:52

And has nothing to show for it. And don't act surprised, dude. We all told you. Yeah. Um, but back a couple sentences ago, you said, ooh, a hot American woman. Yeah. Yes, there are a lot of hot women in America. I know a few. What country do you think has the best looking woman? Hold hold on. All right. FIFA? FIFA? That fucking soccer show? Yeah. How do you say it? FIFA. Um, it's in LA this year. So you've been seeing a lot of pictures from it because, you know, we're here. And uh some of them other countries, they got some smoke shows, dude.

SPEAKER_00 1:08:38

Doesn't Brazil have a lot of good ones? Brazil's got a lot of good ones.

SPEAKER_04 1:08:40

Yes, they do. I the wife likes to, she wants to go when we get a little older on more vacations. And she's always like, well, I don't know where to go. Well, thank you, FIFA. I now have some vacation plans set up. I mean. Wow. You gotta So where are you going? Probably gonna start in Rio. That's in Brazil.

SPEAKER_00 1:09:12

Okay. Um They got busty women, don't they?

SPEAKER_04 1:09:16

And big butted.

SPEAKER_00 1:09:17

Dark hair, dark hair, tan skin, like a Mexican.

SPEAKER_04 1:09:21

Or a Hawaiian, if you will.

SPEAKER_00 1:09:22

Yeah.

SPEAKER_04 1:09:23

Um That's why I'm glad we're white. Y'all know why I'm glad we're white. Why? I'll tell you why I'm glad we're white. It ain't for the privilege.

unknown 1:09:31

Jesus Christ.

SPEAKER_04 1:09:32

There is no privilege. But I'm happy we're white because people don't confuse me. Right.

SPEAKER_01 1:09:40

Yeah.

SPEAKER_04 1:09:41

You know what I mean? Yeah. But I see a Hawaiian, and if she don't talk, or he, if they don't talk, I don't know if they're Hawaiian, uh that island, Samoans, uh, Mexicans. I know they're not uh Japanese. What do you call Asians? I know that because they they've got a different build to them. But that being said, if I was Japanese and you called me Korean or Chinese, I might be a little pissed.

SPEAKER_00 1:10:08

Yeah, and and then and that's a tough one to differ.

SPEAKER_04 1:10:11

And that's not being racist at all. No, it's just I feel bad for them because they don't have identity. Over here in America, we're a slosh pool of fucking genealogy. Right. We all do look different. Yeah. But did you also know that in this globe, there is, and I don't know how they came up with the number, so don't ask me that. 7.8 people that they call them doppelgangers.

SPEAKER_01 1:10:38

Yeah.

SPEAKER_04 1:10:38

Look just like you. Yeah. 7.8 people in the globe look just like you. Yeah. 7.8 people look like me. What happened to the other point too? I want to know. But wouldn't that be awesome if there was a website? There's a Reddit page, there's a Facebook page, people put their pictures on there, and who's my doppelganger? And you get some similar, but never really close. Right. I wish there was like, you know, FBI, CIA, open up your database. Yeah. You know, show me more 35. I can pay, and you'll show me the 7.8 people that look like me. Right. Wouldn't that be awesome?

SPEAKER_00 1:11:14

Because the FBI's got pictures of that.

SPEAKER_04 1:11:16

Fuck yes, they do. And where are they from? You know, is there an Austie that's just fucking laying down pussy like nobody's business? And all of a sudden I go to Australia on vacation and they're like, oh my God, there he is. Where have you been? Yeah. I don't know, mighty.

SPEAKER_00 1:11:38

You might want to work on the you might want to work on the accent.

SPEAKER_04 1:11:42

Yeah, that's another country that's got a lot of hot women. Australia? Yeah. Yeah. Um God's gift over there.

SPEAKER_00 1:11:49

Doesn't Sweden have some good looking?

SPEAKER_04 1:11:51

Sweden. Tall, built like a dump truck.

SPEAKER_00 1:11:55

Mm-hmm. Um what was the other one I was going to say? There's one I had in mind. Can't remember.

SPEAKER_04 1:12:05

Um Japan.

SPEAKER_00 1:12:06

Canada actually has some good looking women.

SPEAKER_04 1:12:08

I don't like to say much good about them, but they do. Yeah. They really do. Fuck. You look at half our goddamn actors, half our musical performers, they're Canadian. Hey? Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 1:12:18

Well, tell them to put their fucking fires out.

SPEAKER_02 1:12:20

Well, they should.

SPEAKER_00 1:12:21

I don't know what kind of party they're having in Canada, but it must be a banger. Because I'm sick and tired of the fucking smoke.

SPEAKER_04 1:12:28

That's gotta be a hood. Do you see the picture of that fucking train?

SPEAKER_05 1:12:31

Uh-uh.

SPEAKER_04 1:12:31

Freight train, uh, I'll have to share it with you. Freight trains going to uh on the railroad track, obviously. Oh, I'd hope so. And uh the fucking tracks are covered in fucking trees and shit, and they're calling for help. Hey, we need a crew out here to clear the tracks so we can get going. And the fire is all the way around them. Oh. You know what?

SPEAKER_00 1:12:57

I ain't seen sunshine since I don't know when. Okay, that's the end of my singing career. You're welcome.

SPEAKER_04 1:13:05

That wasn't bad. Um yeah, I'd be shitting bricks. But fucking throttle up. It's got a blade cow pusher on it. It's gotta push a tree. Unless they're just fucking, you know, I don't know.

SPEAKER_00 1:13:16

I don't know. Um we're about an hour and 14 minutes into this. Yep. And uh I want to bring up one of our newer listeners.

SPEAKER_04 1:13:28

Do we have time so I can get another beer?

SPEAKER_00 1:13:30

Yeah, go ahead. One each. Yeah, while I'm while I'm talking. Who's our new listener? Uh it's a friend of yours who is a mutual uh he and I have a mutual friend.

SPEAKER_04 1:13:39

Um apparently Johnny Novak.

SPEAKER_00 1:13:42

Yes. All right, um, apparently he's good buddies with one of my friends, and you know him from way back in the day. And I said to my buddy Jeff, I said, Hey, I said, Your buddy is listening to the podcast now. He says, Oh yeah, that's all that guy does is podcast. I don't know how somebody could listen to so many different podcasts. He listens to Ag Podcasts, he listens to this podcast, that podcast. He's I mean, he says, That's all that guy does, listen to podcasts.

SPEAKER_04 1:14:13

You are not gonna meet a better guy.

SPEAKER_00 1:14:15

Well, I feel like I met him.

SPEAKER_04 1:14:17

You did over at Jeff's.

SPEAKER_00 1:14:18

Yeah. And uh he um he's like something got brought up about uh about you. He's like, Oh yeah, I used to work with that guy. Blah, blah, blah. He's funnier than hell. This and that. And so my buddy Jeff said, Well, fuck. Do you listen to their podcast? He says, No, I didn't know they had a podcast. And uh he says, Oh yeah, you gotta listen to their podcast. Him and another buddy of mine, they do the uh they do this this deal. And uh, so he's obviously listening because he commented last week on on one of them and called us a bunch of drunk fuckers. Um and I'm gonna take uh that as a compliment.

SPEAKER_04 1:14:59

That's how we meant it. Yeah. Guaranteed.

SPEAKER_00 1:15:01

Yeah. So uh John, glad you're listening. Um hope you continue to listen. If you made it through the first four episodes and are still listening, thank you. Yes, yeah, thank you.

SPEAKER_04 1:15:14

Yeah, John's uh you you're there's a lot of people out there, but he is he is actually one of the really, really good guys. He so never said a bad word about anybody that wasn't true.

SPEAKER_00 1:15:27

One of our last uh baseball games we had at home. Actually, it was our last home game we had, the uh city fitted and striped the wrong ball field. And we get there and it was like there's no fucking lines painted, there's branches and fucking tree limbs all over. Right. So Jeff's wife called Jeff and said, Hey, field ain't done. That John stopped everything he was doing, hightailed it over to the ball fields, grabbed the tractor with a little toe behind deal that sweeps the field and all that, got all the shit out, and at a at the last minute's notice before the game started, he was out there, got the field in tip top shape, and his boy went out, chalked the whole field up, got it all done, so we could have our game. So I don't know him, I don't know him that well, but I thought that was pretty uh pretty upstanding and thought it was pretty sweet that he dropped what he was doing just to come over and take care of the kids. I mean, you're talking 12 U baseball, but he he dropped everything and came right out and did it.

SPEAKER_04 1:16:51

Um that's just the way he is. Yeah. Yep. So I thought that was pretty cool. Yeah, yeah, because you met him over at Jeff's after uh there was a swimming. We were over there swimming for.

SPEAKER_00 1:17:03

Was it after the golf audience?

SPEAKER_04 1:17:05

No, because this was just last year and we didn't golf in the outing.

SPEAKER_00 1:17:08

Oh, well, because if it was after golf outing, you ain't gonna remember. I don't remember nothing.

SPEAKER_04 1:17:11

Yeah, that's coming up in probably about four weeks, three weeks. Not even.

SPEAKER_00 1:17:16

Three, four, yeah.

SPEAKER_04 1:17:17

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 1:17:18

Speaking of golf outing, did we get in on uh um I was late to the golden sponsoring hole?

SPEAKER_04 1:17:24

I was late to the game.

SPEAKER_00 1:17:24

So we'll sponsor the Eaton Rabbits one then.

SPEAKER_04 1:17:26

We'll we'll get in there. Yeah. Um yeah, uh we're gonna have to have to start doing more community stuff.

SPEAKER_00 1:17:36

Yeah, yeah. Give back to the community.

SPEAKER_04 1:17:39

Uh perpetually around, contact us, tell us what's so great about your community. Yeah. You know, I like our communities, but we ain't against helping out in other communities.

SPEAKER_00 1:17:48

Plus it's Portland.

SPEAKER_04 1:17:49

Well, they got enough issues. They don't need us.

SPEAKER_00 1:17:54

You hit the nail on the head with that. We are an issue. Yeah, yeah. You don't have to. So if you're if your community needs issues, give us a call. Invite us, yeah. We're in. Yep. We put the fun and dysfunctional.

SPEAKER_04 1:18:06

Okay. Yeah, it's in there. Had to spell it real quick. Sounded out. Dysfunctional fun. Yeah, but you gotta really slow it down.

SPEAKER_00 1:18:18

Oh my god. Good thing you talk fast.

SPEAKER_04 1:18:20

Yeah, well, you know. So uh Pat McAfee, that name Ringabaldia? Yes. Uh he used to uh kick the ball for the Indianapolis Colts and then he held the ball for the field goal kickers. I'm gonna stop you right there. Yep.

SPEAKER_00 1:18:37

He does some TV shows.

SPEAKER_04 1:18:39

Yes, he does.

SPEAKER_00 1:18:40

And I think he is different? He's past different. He's annoying as fuck.

SPEAKER_04 1:18:52

Oh, you don't like him?

SPEAKER_00 1:18:53

No. Unless he's giving us money, then I love him. Well. Do you know him?

SPEAKER_04 1:18:59

I don't.

SPEAKER_00 1:19:00

Oh. But no harm done. I got a story about the guy, because he's kind of a know-it-all arrogant dildo.

SPEAKER_04 1:19:12

He's Joe Rogan with a different hairdo. Fight me on it. I'll put Pat McAfee against Joe Rogan any day on Entertainment Factor. Because Joe Rogan has lost his entertainment factor. Joe Rogan is entertaining because of the guests he brings on.

SPEAKER_00 1:19:29

Joe Rogan sold himself to Be Rich. Oh, yeah. He is run by the money.

SPEAKER_05 1:19:42

Uh-huh.

SPEAKER_00 1:19:45

I'll tell I I will give you that. But Pat McAfee is fucking annoying to listen to. He gets on that sports broadcasting and he just don't shut the fuck up. He's like a barking dog. You hear him, but you don't.

SPEAKER_04 1:20:02

Okay. Go ahead. Can I share my story? Yes, please. This might change your outlook on him. Okay. Okay. So he has always given a lot of money away to people. And uh McAfee, when you get an email from perpetuallywrong.com, please do not listen to this episode. But he his contract was eight million, eight and a half million dollars from ESPN this last go around. Okay. And all of his assistants, his people that helped him, do his hair, answer his phone, you know, all them people. Yep. We're gonna have them someday.

SPEAKER_00 1:20:41

Yeah. I don't have no hair to do, but I could go for some blush.

SPEAKER_04 1:20:45

Yeah, a little keep the sheen off. Yeah. Yeah. Do we gotta start doing makeup yet, you think? Not yet. No? Okay. Anywho, he took that money from ESPN and he said, Ha ha, thanks, you fucks. And he gave every one of the people that helped him get there, gave him a backpack for a gift. Okay. And they're like, oh wow, a backpack. He just signed eight and a half million dollar contract and he gave us a backpack. They opened the backpack and there's two hundred and fifty thousand dollars in there for each and every one of them.

SPEAKER_00 1:21:17

As a bonus. Yeah. Because they're getting paid to do their job. Oh, isn't that nice? You know. I mean. Okay, so that is pretty respectable.

SPEAKER_04 1:21:29

When we get big, I'm gonna give this bricklayer probably $150.

SPEAKER_00 1:21:34

It's about all he's worth.

SPEAKER_04 1:21:37

Um much money did Rogan give his uh hope?

SPEAKER_00 1:21:41

Probably not.

SPEAKER_04 1:21:41

Yeah. Because he he thinks he's too good for it.

SPEAKER_00 1:21:44

So I will I will eat a little crow, knowing that now. And I have no problem eating crow because I'm not a liberal. And I will say that that's that was nice. Pretty nice. Yes. So annoying or not, he's got values.

SPEAKER_04 1:22:02

Yes. And I'm not gonna go against you on that. McAfee can be over the top. A little hard to take at times, yes. But some doing shit like that, that is just eh, way to go. That's that's pretty pretty solid. And I'm sure he did a lot of that because his tax advisor probably said, uh, let's get rid of some of this, you know.

SPEAKER_00 1:22:23

So it wasn't all from the Andy's manager says, hey, you're kind of kind of a dildo, and you're kind of annoying. If you do this, it's gonna look good in the public's eyes.

SPEAKER_04 1:22:34

And I'm John Q public, and it looked good in my eyes. Um, you know, it's nice to see that there are people like that still, though. Yeah. You know, I like Bradley Cooper. I think he's a damn good actor, but I don't see him gifting out a bunch of his money.

SPEAKER_01 1:22:51

Right.

SPEAKER_04 1:22:51

Um, Michael Jackson, he would have kept living. I think he would have done good with his money, but they killed my trailer. Yeah. Him and that fucking monkey.

SPEAKER_00 1:23:00

Yeah. You think he ever spanked it?

SPEAKER_04 1:23:03

Oh, I know he did. Yeah. But I don't think he ever touched boys.

SPEAKER_00 1:23:06

I don't either. I don't think. I think that was a bad misconception.

SPEAKER_04 1:23:11

Yep.

SPEAKER_00 1:23:11

I think, and we touched on it probably about ten episodes ago. Um, where I think he was misunderstood.

SPEAKER_04 1:23:19

Very much so. And if he was growing up today, I think it'd be a whole different outcome.

SPEAKER_00 1:23:24

Yeah, and I think uh, you know, there's there's one of our listeners, a friend of ours, that thinks that old MJ is the best.

SPEAKER_04 1:23:35

Michael Jordan? Oh, Michael Jackson. Yes.

SPEAKER_00 1:23:37

They call him MJ? Well, I did.

SPEAKER_04 1:23:39

Are they both called MJ?

SPEAKER_00 1:23:40

Maybe.

SPEAKER_04 1:23:40

That gets confusing.

SPEAKER_00 1:23:41

Um Hey Jordan, stop touching the kids. But you cannot badmouth Michael Jackson in front of him.

SPEAKER_04 1:23:52

He Oh, is he a pretty good protector of the name?

SPEAKER_00 1:23:54

Oh, he is.

SPEAKER_04 1:23:55

I didn't know that.

SPEAKER_00 1:23:56

Yes. And uh, so of course, me being me, I poke the bear often as I can.

SPEAKER_04 1:24:05

Oh, you're talking not badmouthing in front of Dexter.

unknown 1:24:09

Yeah.

SPEAKER_04 1:24:09

I thought you were talking about not badmouthing in front of Michael Jordan. You see my confusion there? Yeah. Okay. No, no, no, don't badmouth Michael Jackson.

SPEAKER_00 1:24:17

Is Dexter a really big Jackson fan?

SPEAKER_04 1:24:19

Oh, yeah. All the way back to the Jackson 5?

SPEAKER_00 1:24:21

Yeah, and he uh he I told him, I said, Michael Jackson's still alive, he's over there on that island. He gets he gets a little heated about it. Don't, don't, don't, he says, that's blasphemy.

SPEAKER_04 1:24:34

Don't you dare. What would you do if all of a sudden one day you're driving through Kalamazoo and you see Elvis walking down the road of Michael Jackson?

SPEAKER_00 1:24:43

Elvis is dead by now, for sure.

SPEAKER_04 1:24:45

You think?

SPEAKER_00 1:24:46

Even though everybody thinks he's that pastor. How old would he be? Bob Hope. Old.

SPEAKER_04 1:24:51

Not bullshit. He'd be like a hundred. But he's not even my grandma's age. But he is Elvis Presley.

SPEAKER_00 1:24:59

How old would he be if he was alive today?

SPEAKER_04 1:25:02

Ha ha! Three years younger than my grandmother. Oh shit. Yep. So maybe it is Bob Hope. 94 is my grandma right now. So he'd be 90 uh one. I thought he was older than that. I was just saying that just so I could look it up. Um I don't think he is that great. I I would side with the Jackson being better than the Elvis.

SPEAKER_00 1:25:26

Yeah. So you'd really shit your pants if Michael Jackson and Tupac were walking down the street together.

SPEAKER_04 1:25:35

Oh no, that'd be something.

SPEAKER_00 1:25:36

Because I think they're both still alive.

SPEAKER_04 1:25:39

They could be, but I don't see Michael walking with Tupac. Hey! So down. Shut up, motherfucker. Oh no. I gotta watch that. Uh no, I just want to call him MJ. You see what you did to me? Sorry? Yeah. Um, I want to watch his documentary.

SPEAKER_00 1:26:00

Well, I don't know. Does anybody else refer to him as MJ? I don't think they do. Let us know. Let us know.

SPEAKER_04 1:26:05

Because MJ is when you say MJ, you're thinking Nike. Yeah. You're thinking golf.

SPEAKER_00 1:26:11

Well, now he owns race cars.

SPEAKER_04 1:26:13

Yep. Is that how Bubba got the job?

SPEAKER_00 1:26:17

No, Bubba was racing before Michael Jackson started owning a team.

SPEAKER_04 1:26:20

Jordan.

SPEAKER_00 1:26:21

Yeah. Jordan. The thriller! Uh yeah, I don't know. No, Bubba Bubba was racing before that. So yeah.

SPEAKER_04 1:26:34

Coyotes. Um. Because he got uh we talked about this too a couple weeks ago. But uh James Stewart and Motocross, he got him going. Michael Jordan did. Did he? Yep. I didn't know that. Yep. And then uh yeah, he so okay. Um before we get all the way to the end of this, uh we were talking about racing now. Yeah. And okay. Me and you take a little stroll. Give me a track. Not Michigan.

SPEAKER_00 1:27:07

NASCAR track?

SPEAKER_04 1:27:08

Uh just a track.

SPEAKER_00 1:27:09

Martinsville.

SPEAKER_04 1:27:10

Okay. Nope, that's not gonna work.

SPEAKER_00 1:27:12

Bristol.

SPEAKER_04 1:27:13

Nope, not gonna work.

SPEAKER_00 1:27:14

Um uh Pocono. That's a triangle track. Pocono.

SPEAKER_04 1:27:19

Okay, Daytona. Let's say Daytona. You told me to give you a fucking track, and this is a good one. Okay. Okay. And the road course is set up, the oval's set up.

SPEAKER_01 1:27:31

Yeah.

SPEAKER_04 1:27:32

There's a NASCAR sitting there, and there's an F1 car sitting there. Yes. Which one you gonna jump in? Uh go ahead, Bob. Jump in one. But you gotta take the appropriate track. And I know NASCAR does road courses, but when I say this I mean oval or road course. F one road. Yeah. Which one you gonna take? No, you only do it once, because we're not gonna give you a good

SPEAKER_00 1:28:00

I'm taking the F1 car.

SPEAKER_04 1:28:01

Yep. Good decision.

SPEAKER_00 1:28:03

And I'll tell you why. I spent a lot of years of my life turning left. Running oval. And it's not even so much that, because I think I'd perform way better in the cup car than I would the F1 car. Actually, I know I would. But when you go to Daytona and you get out on the track, you put it to the floor and you never let up.

SPEAKER_04 1:28:30

Let's go.

SPEAKER_00 1:28:30

Ever. You never let off the game.

SPEAKER_04 1:28:32

Yeah, Dega's the same way, ain't it?

SPEAKER_00 1:28:33

Yes. Now I've experienced stock car racing. I did it. And uh you snap me with every brain, I'm gonna fucking stab you in the eye with this pen. Anyway, um the F1 cars have so much power, so much G forces. I and and I'm gonna tell you right now, anybody that says, I get an F1 car and fucking run it. No, you can't. Like those guys train.

SPEAKER_04 1:29:10

You're not gonna take off.

SPEAKER_00 1:29:12

You'll never you would the average person would get in one of them fucking cars and they would be going like 80 to 100, and they come to a corner and they'd fucking slower it down to like 40.

SPEAKER_04 1:29:26

I would be happy if I could get in one and go 500 yards straight without turning that fucker. Right. You know what I mean? Yeah, no, honestly.

SPEAKER_00 1:29:36

The the F1 drivers are they are fine-tuned machines to drive them things.

SPEAKER_04 1:29:43

And it would be awesome.

SPEAKER_00 1:29:44

It'd be great. But I'm going F1 car.

SPEAKER_04 1:29:47

Now, you go to short track, you put me at Bristol. I'm gonna get a NASCAR because I think that'd be a fucking hoot.

SPEAKER_00 1:29:53

Yeah.

SPEAKER_04 1:29:54

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 1:29:54

Yeah. Because it's like bumper cars.

SPEAKER_04 1:29:56

Pretty much, yeah. Just push each other all the way around the fucking track 500 times.

SPEAKER_00 1:30:00

I actually ran at Bristol.

SPEAKER_04 1:30:02

Oh, you did?

SPEAKER_00 1:30:04

And uh it was It's the biggest track I've raced on. It's a half mile. Um but I'll tell you right now.

SPEAKER_04 1:30:16

Most bank track you've ever been on, too, probably.

SPEAKER_00 1:30:18

Yes. It is. And I'm gonna tell you right now it's concrete surface, and whoever did that did a phenomenal job. It is the smoothest surface you will ever be on in your life. You can go down a brand new paved road. Any paved road you've ever been on, and you're like, oh my god, this thing is smooth, it rides good in your personal car.

SPEAKER_04 1:30:47

Times tenant over there.

SPEAKER_00 1:30:48

Yes. It was like driving on a piece of glass.

SPEAKER_04 1:30:51

Well, are there companies? I know, like when you get into Supercrosp, there's companies that build the tracks. Yeah. Monster trucks, there's companies that build the tracks.

SPEAKER_00 1:31:00

Yes. Same thing.

SPEAKER_04 1:31:01

Oh, there are companies that specialize in. I mean, you gotta be good at pouring the shit.

SPEAKER_00 1:31:08

You better be damn good.

SPEAKER_04 1:31:09

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 1:31:10

And I'm telling you, when I was running around that track, it was it was the weirdest thing because it was like just it was like driving across the piece of glass.

SPEAKER_04 1:31:20

Now, was your car fast enough where it was like kind of similar to NASCAR?

SPEAKER_00 1:31:27

So you didn't need as much brakes there, but just let off it and wrap it. The horsepower that my car had that I was running there was probably the same horsepower as the cup cars, but a lot lighter. So you would go, and the aerodynamics were not what the cup cars have, so you don't have as much force keeping you planted and a lot less tire. So power to weight ratio, I had more power than they had. And um you'd you'd kind of let off the throttle a little bit, let the car sit into the corner, and you'd pick that fucker back up and you'd have it to the wood. We were around like 155 around there.

SPEAKER_04 1:32:17

Oh, you're doing pretty good.

SPEAKER_00 1:32:18

Yeah. So don't point at me.

SPEAKER_04 1:32:25

We had an idea for getting rich. We talked about it Saturday. Do you remember what it was? Yes.

SPEAKER_00 1:32:31

What was it? We can't disclose that.

SPEAKER_04 1:32:34

Will you tell me afterwards because I've been racking my brain?

SPEAKER_00 1:32:36

Okay. Yes. Watch out for a new product line from Bob and Brad.

SPEAKER_04 1:32:41

Yes, I do remember. Yeah. And I started checking into how we go about patenting and stuff. Yep. And there's going to be a lot of homework. That comes in.

SPEAKER_00 1:32:53

You've got time at work because I don't.

SPEAKER_04 1:32:54

Um yeah, gonna be a lot of. But yeah, we gotta get that rolling. Yeah, we should talk to Big Mike. He listens to us. Yep. Big Mike Calkins. Yep. We're gonna need some help from you, buddy.

SPEAKER_00 1:33:06

Yeah. Yeah, so reach out.

SPEAKER_04 1:33:08

Yep.

SPEAKER_00 1:33:09

Send a message.

SPEAKER_04 1:33:10

What do you need? Nothing's too much.

SPEAKER_00 1:33:13

Correct.

SPEAKER_04 1:33:14

That's what the message needs to say.

SPEAKER_00 1:33:15

Yep. And you think he's still listening?

SPEAKER_04 1:33:19

Oh yeah.

SPEAKER_00 1:33:20

He's on his way home from work listening.

SPEAKER_04 1:33:23

He is still. Fuck.

SPEAKER_00 1:33:25

Well, not right now. It's not live. But by the time he gets this far into the episode, he'll be on his way home.

SPEAKER_04 1:33:30

Oh yeah. So yeah.

SPEAKER_00 1:33:32

All right. Let's go quits. I'm I'm out of uh I'm exhausted.

SPEAKER_04 1:33:37

Remember. Smoke. Yeah. Killing me.

SPEAKER_00 1:33:40

Who?

SPEAKER_04 1:33:42

So everybody's a smoker today.

SPEAKER_00 1:33:44

Yeah. Yep. And if you used to be a smoker and you quit, well, you started back today.

SPEAKER_04 1:33:49

Don't go to Speedway and buy another pack. Just keep quitting.

SPEAKER_00 1:33:52

Don't get your token because you failed. On that note, we're going to go ahead and uh step out of here. As always. Hold on.

SPEAKER_04 1:34:02

Oh. Hold up, wait a minute. I got one suggestion here.

SPEAKER_01 1:34:06

Oh.

SPEAKER_04 1:34:06

Just came through on an earlier episode.

SPEAKER_01 1:34:09

Oh.

SPEAKER_04 1:34:10

They said that after you say your tagline to leave, that you say goodbye in a different language every time. They said, uh, I noticed that you guys claim you're in 37 countries now. I think it would be appropriate if Bob would say goodbye in a different language every week to tell all them people that you're thinking of them.

SPEAKER_00 1:34:32

I don't know any other language.

SPEAKER_04 1:34:34

You can start with English this week.

SPEAKER_00 1:34:35

Okay.

SPEAKER_04 1:34:36

So this week it's next week, maybe proper English.

SPEAKER_00 1:34:40

Yep. So, as always, stay positive, test negative, and we'll catch you next week.